Is it Healthy to Rationalise Your Feelings?

When faced with a traumatic event, everyone has different ways to react and cope with it. Some people avoid the situation or block out whatever thoughts they may have, while some may lash out at others in anger. These are known as defence mechanisms, which are unconscious strategies people utilise to protect themselves from anxiety or threats to self-esteem (Cherry, 2023). In this article, we will be exploring one known as rationalisation. We will learn more about what rationalisation is and whether it is healthy to rationalise our feelings when dealing with difficult situations.

What is rationalisation? 

According to Freud, rationalisation allows people to justify their thoughts or behaviours without experiencing conflicts, anxiety, or shame if they face their true motivations. (Freud, 1894, cited in Cherry, 2023)

According to a study (Kay, Jimenez and Jost, 2002, cited in Keohan, 2023), rationalisation typically falls into one of two categories: sour grapes and sweet lemons. 

• “Sour grapes” refers to rationalisations that convinces people that something seemingly impossible that they are trying to obtain is not worth the effort 

  • A famous rationalisation defence mechanism example is the Aesop fable The Fox and the Grapes, where when a fox tried to grab the grapes but failed, he told himself that the grapes are probably sour

• “Sweet lemons” refers to rationalisations that try to cast negative situations in a positive light. This is usually when people try to tell themselves that something undesirable is actually something that they wanted or planned all along.

If you are interested in what rationalisation can look like in different settings such as counselling and in a forensic setting, check out this article (Beltrani, 2024) to find out more!

Is this a healthy defence mechanism? 

If done moderately, this can be a good way to cope with situations as it allows us to alleviate stress in the moment (Cherry, 2023) and avoid the emotions we are not ready to deal with (Keohan, 2023). 

However, like most things, if done to the extreme, this can cause us to avoid reality and the problems that we need to solve. Rationalising can lead us to have poor accountability and cause us to make bad decisions. It can also limit our personal growth as we do not face our true motivations (Cherry, 2023). 

Conclusion

In conclusion, rationalisation is a defence mechanism that allows people to come up with reasons to justify the emotions they are having when faced with difficult situations. Though it may be healthy and alright to do so in the short run, if we do not tackle the root cause of why we feel this way, rationalisation can actually bring more harm than good by causing us to avoid reality and hide from underlying problems that we have. 

Works Cited 

Beltrani, A. (2024). Rationalization: A Closer Look at the Defense Mechanism in Various Settings. [online] Available at: https://concept.paloaltou.edu/resources/business-of-practice-blog/rationalization-a-closer-look?_gl=1. [Accessed 1 Jul. 2024]

Cherry, K. (2023) Using Rationalization as a Defense Mechanism. [online] Verywell Mind. Avaliable at: https://www.verywellmind.com/using-rationalization-as-a-defense-mechanism-7484497 [Accessed 29 Jun. 2024]

Keohan, E. (2023). Rationalization as a Defense Mechanism. [online] Talkspace. Available at: https://www.talkspace.com/blog/rationalization-defense-mechanism/. [Accessed 30 Jun. 2024]

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